I've been really depressed for short bursts of time lately. I ask myself in the morning if i have a reason to get out of bed, I watch the train coming down the tracks and wonder if I should jump, I chicken out by saying I have stuff to finish and look forward to.
I don't care for school anymore, except for some subjects which I see as more important, I would really rather focus on my art and voice and psychology related stuff.
it kills me that this is happening, but don't know what to do about it. I refuse to get diagnosed with some crap mental disorder that requires me to become attached to pills with stupid names.
My so called friends can't help
My parents can't help
Any other authority I go to will just send me to a white coat and give me aforementioned crap pills to pop.
This is just so fucking frustrating, that I've got all these fucking problems but no one can do a damn thing about them.
Right now it's just hard to find something to live for.
But I'm just to cowardly to find a painless way to take my own life, so anyone who bothers reading this shouldn't worry.

-Mokona